We'll Always Be Harmonizing

So the opening of Birdie went surprisingly very well and was well-received by the audience, which I guess isn't too surprising because while it is kind of a dumb show, it's cute and fun and enjoyable to watch. We had the cast party at the Fairview house and it was a blast. Lots of silliness and good times happening for sure. Highlights include Karla and Monica re-inacting Bosom Buddies, exploring the attic and John scaring the shit out of Andy and I, drunk-dialing everyone from the company, and everyone commenting on how delicious the cookies were though they were the easiest things to make ever haha.

I had a really good conversation with Heather as well. I told her about my goals for my career and how I was going to apply to grad school for performing arts administration, and she told me I should focus on music since it's really what I want to do. It just made me re-think what I should be doing and maybe I really should just focus on the music. It's hard though because I feel like I am not good enough, that there are so many people out there more talented than I am. And yet at the same time I know I have what it takes, that I have something special and unique that I can bring to the table. I want to help create theatre that has artistic value, to create a product worth viewing and that moves people. I understand that has to fall to the wayside, especially in summerstock because there just isn't time, but I don't want to be stuck in that world forever. Maybe that's why I enjoyed doing it so much in college because there was time and the only pressure we faced was creating a quality show. I think I want every production I do to be like how RENT was, but the reality is that's just not possible. I guess I can only hope that I will get a chance to be a part of a production like that again. Maybe that's why I want to do arts administration because I really want to be a producer, so I really have my hand in the show, yet keep music directing as well since I do enjoy that too. I think the thing I missed most from this summer was being involved in the production side of the show, so maybe in the future that will be different.